May 29th ~ Inwardly, unconsciously, there is the tremendous weight of the past pushing you in a certain direction.
Now, how is one to wipe all that away? How is the unconscious to be cleansed immediately of the past? The analysts think that the unconscious can be partially or even completely cleansed through analysis–through investigation, exploration, confession, the interpretation of dreams, and so on–so that at least you become a “normal” human being, able to adjust yourself to the present environment. But in analysis there is always the analyzer and the analyzed, and observer who is interpreting the thing observed, which is a duality, a source of conflict.
So I see that mere analysis of the unconscious will not lead anywhere. It may help me to be a little less neurotic, a little kinder to my wife, to my neighbor, or some superficial thing like that; but that is not what we are talking about. I see that the analytical process–which involves time, interpretation, the movement of thought as the observer analyzing the thing observed–cannot free the unconscious; therefore I reject the analytical process completely. The moment I perceive the fact that analysis cannot under any circumstances clear away the burden of the unconscious, I am out of analysis. I no longer analyze. So what has taken place? Because there is no longer an analyzer separated from the thing that he analyzes, he is that thing. He is not an entity apart from it. Then one finds that the unconscious is of very little importance.
February 11th, 2020 ~ The thought that just came in is how Buddhism and like-minded thought isn’t more popular. People say things based on their knowledge and then change it later on when they get more knowledge. There is a feeling I am trying to convey so the words aren’t exactly what I am feeling or even thinking. However, at least with Buddhism, the idea that we can’t really know and can’t really express what we are experiencing is pretty much the way it is. Hopefully, we become more humble along the way. But, most people don’t do that. I am not sure I can articulate what I am experiencing. I remember hearing the a well-known person ( I will leave his name out) talk about a time that he was depressed during his marriage to a former relatively famous person. He had certain beliefs that he expressed back then. He wasn’t living true to himself. But now, he had changed. He was more care free. And, he was a proponent of this carefree life. In fact, he used to live this way and had strayed from that when he was married. When he was married, evidently, he wasn’t happy. I guess my point is that it is interesting how we can share how we are in the past, including vulnerability, but it is hard to share how we are in the moment. Did he know at the time he wasn’t happy? Should we be sure he is happy during this particular interview? I remember this idea and have wondered about it on a few occasions. It is very difficult for us to share about our current experiences. Is it because we aren’t yet aware of them? Are we resisting them?
We are analyzing. We are separate. There is conflict.